Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. ~1 Corinthians 13:4-7
When the “BIG DAY” comes and you say, “I do.” You actually mean it. I know I did. But why do 49% of marriages have the misfortune of ending in divorce? Is it because its easy? Is it convenience? What is it? Oh, infidelity, lack of interest/boredom and change in physical appearance. Oh…I get it! But what about the 51%?? Do we not face the same things? We get bored. We change physically. And quite frankly, when life gets in the way, your sex life inevitably circles the drain, guess what?? YOU PICK IT BACK UP! Get back to adding the habañeros and jalapeños and spice that thing right back up again!
My husband said once, “Like there’s a circle of life, there’s the circle of love. Its perfectly normal to fall in and out of love again.” While, he’s no marriage expert, I totally agree. What makes us so different? I, for one, know that its way easier to leave when its tough, but I stay because of LOVE — genuine, true love and commitment we made to one another, in addition to the fact that I dig this guy! You build so much together and invest so much in each other, it seems simple. But, actually, it’s not. My 76 year old grandmother, who is a seasoned veteran at this whole marriage thing, told me when I got married: “Staying married will be the hardest thing you’ll ever do. Leaving will come easy, so stay and work things out!” Boy, Oh boy! is this easier said than done.
I hate to admit it, but I see so many sour, bitter Facebook and Twitter posts about the trending disbelief in the constitution of marriage or hopes of finding a good man/wife. I find it sad, because I still believe. We just have to go into it saying, “Look, I’m not easy to live with. You’re not either. Let’s do our best to make this thing work and see to it that we have fun in the process.” (or something like that)
I was reading an article, about Lloyd and Evelyn Collins who have been married 77 years. That’s incredible! Big shout to my own grandparents who will be celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary TODAY June 7, 2012 and I am so happy to have celebrated with them this past weekend!! But this couple I was reading about, is from Louisiana. They share their story (and secrets) about the longevity of their marriage. A cute little excerpt about when they met:
“In 1934, gasoline cost ten cents a gallon, Shirley Temple made her first feature film debut, and Henry Ford’s Model T car was the most popular vehicle.”
It was also the year that the couple fell in love. Now seven decades later, they’re still living happily ever after. The story of Lloyd and Evelyn Collins looks and sounds much like that of my own grandparents. My grandfather at age 18 (3.5 years her senior), courted my grandmother, asked to marry her only months after their first date and 60 years later, they are still living together, happily ever after. My grandmother jokingly recalled when she was asked to speak at their anniversary celebration:
“He stole me…I was only 15 years old and he told the Justice of Peace that I was 18 years old…[laughing] He robbed the cradle!!! But seriously, I will do anything for him…he had surgery recently and he’s doing good and I am so glad. ‘Cause when he hurts, I hurt and when he feels good…I feel good.” (insert awwww…and swoon)
These are the kinds of stories of real life romance and longevity that keep me hopeful. Hopeful that when the times get rough, NOBODY gets going. You work it out!! Times have changed. But real love is the same –no matter the era. I hope there are still some believers, like myself, in the “til death do us part of the vow”…I’m inspired. Are you?
Click here to read the entire story of Lloyd and Evelyn Collins.
Keeping it Smart & Sassy,